Droshos - Soul Searching

All of us have the ability to do soul-searching. Where does this power in us come from? There are a few reasons why people search.

One reason why we search in life is because our intellect demands knowledge; there is a force in our mind known as chefetz hasichli (intellectual desire), which creates in us a longing to know more.

Another reason why we search is because our soul is made up of five parts: Nefesh, Ruach, Neshamah, Chayah, and Yechidah. Even in our the lowest part of our Nefesh, which is the nefesh habehamis – the animalistic part of us – wants to search for something in life. But our animalistic part in us looks for things that aren’t important, such as another way of gratifying our desires.

Then there is a third kind of search – it is written, “And the soul is not fulfilled.” Our soul, which is found in our heart, wants to fill its emptiness. This is a true kind of search – when we are searching to fulfill our emptiness.

We aren’t speaking about searching to fulfill our desires, which comes from our animalistic part in the soul. Usually, people search because they have a desire for knowledge, which is the first kind of search we mentioned. But even when people search for knowledge they aren’t necessarily motivated because they want to know the truth. It doesn’t come from a sense of emptiness in oneself. People just like to know more, but not because they want to fill up their emptiness.

There are many people who think they are perfect, and are quite confident that they always know what they’re talking about. But we know that the soul of a person is complicating, and there are many layers to it; when a person thinks he’s all right, does he know for sure which part of his soul he derives satisfaction from? Let’s say a person is happy with his life and feels fulfilled. It seems like he’s perfect, but really, he’s only deriving fulfillment from one part in his soul. It’s not because he’s disillusioned; it is simply because he is only experiencing life though only one part of his soul.

Even if a person really feels happy, it is only because he is experiencing a part of his soul. There are more layers in our soul which are deeper than the layers we have uncovered, because the soul is very complex and deep. We need to thus search more for meaning in life and not be satisfied with just feeling good about ourselves.

The Rambam writes that all pleasure is found inside your very own soul. It is not found outside of a person, unlike how people think; it is found inside you, in your soul.

Just like Creation is full of layers – there is a earth, then a sky, then outer space which is full of layers within layers – so is our soul a layer within another layer. When a person knows what he is made up of, he can then know how to search.

The soul we have is like a microcosm of the entire universe. A person can find everything he needs to find hidden inside of himself. Inside the soul, there is the entire universe – the sun, the moon and all the stars. There is also the four elements of fire, water, earth and air. When a person understands how it’s all inside of him, he will be able to realize that he never has to search outside for pleasure; he only needs to find it within himself. The pleasure we have on this world is only a tool we can use to uncover the pleasure from within us.

When a person desires this world’s pleasures, he has a Ratzon (will). The word Ratzon comes the word ratz, to run. When a person desires worldly pleasure, he’s sort of running outside himself.

One of the Sages said (Sukkah 54a), “If I am here, then everything is here.” When a person purifies his “I” – then everything is there. This means that when a person realizes who he really is, he has everything. If a person thinks he’s just a body, he identifies himself based on his height and physical looks. He doesn’t know how to identify himself properly – he has no idea who he is! The true you is a place of happiness in yourself, in which everything can be found.

We can find even non-Jews who are good-hearted by nature and enjoy helping people. But a non-Jew is always missing something. He only acts good in a superficial manner, because he has no source of good in his soul. Only a Jew, who has a complete soul, can act good to others from the depth of his soul.

We learn Torah, but do we realize that it’s our life? Do we realize that we need the Torah to sustain our life? When it comes to our body, we know well what it needs; someone who doesn’t must see a psychologist! But when it comes to our soul, we don’t worry about its needs. This is because we live in a physical world, and we only see our body, not our soul. We know we have a soul, but we don’t see it.

When a person seeks spiritual fulfillment, it is really because he hasn’t yet revealed his soul. It is because he identifies himself as mainly being a body and not as a soul. It is our job to get used to thinking differently about ourselves and realize we are a soul. This is not mere words of inspiration – it is an entirely different way of viewing life.